I like art and photography.
I forget other people can see this sometimes.
The more I grow up, the more I realize I don't know anything.
I'm young and stupid and melodramatic.
I don't really like to talk about my feelings, so I express them through pictures and words.
This is my Diary.
........................................
| Girl: | I feel like I've had a bereavement. |
| Boy: | Nothings changed. |
| Girl: | I feel like I've lost you and yet you're standing right here in front of me. |
| Boy: | <silence> |
| Girl: | Why do I feel this way? |
| Boy: | Sigh, I don't know, nothing's different, I'm here aren't I? Isn't that enough? |
| Girl: | You may be standing here right now but you're not mine anymore. |
| Boy: | I don't know what more to say. |
| Girl cries and all she can think is, why won't you just hug me and tell me it'll all be ok? | |
| : | '( |
I HATE:
Not talking to you.
Not knowing where you are.
Not knowing how you are.
Not hearing your voice.
Not being able to hold your hand.
Starting to text you then realizing I can’t send it.
Not being able to share my day with you.
Being sad.
Being lonely.
Wishing you were with me.
When I cry when something reminds me of you *everything reminds me of you*. Especially in public.
Missing you.
That you’re all I can think of. All day every day.
When I think of you and my eyes can’ help but well up with tears.
That you think I don’t care.
That you think I stopped loving you.
When I get a new text message and hope it’s you, just to be dissapointed.
That I can’t control my tears or feelings.
Wondering if there was more we could have done.
That your clothes are still in my drawers and I don’t want to move them.
Not knowing what you’re thinking.
That I have to go out in an hour and now, I can’t stop crying.
Being confused.
Waiting for your call.
Wondering if it is better this way.
Not being a part of your life.
Second guessing myself.
Wondering if you’re thinking about me.
That I’d still do anything to be with you.
That you changed.
That you don’t treat me the same way you used to.
That you couldn’t just sound happy to hear from me. Even if you had to fake it.
That you pushed me away.
That I smoke the same cigarettes that you do so my hands will smell like yours.
That I’m so pathetic that I smell my hands to remind myself of you.
That we’re so young and stupid.
The mistakes we both made.
That you don’t see I still want us to be together.
That I can’t tell you that.
3,095 miles.
THAT YOU COULDN’T BE BETTER AT COMMUNICATING.
That you’re probably fine and getting on with your life.
All the stupid little fights we had.
That I hurt you.
That you hurt me.
Constantly having dreams of you and us… then waking up.
How melodramatic and naive I sound.
That I still wear the ring you gave me.
That you can’t see that I’ll never give up on us.
YOU except I don’t.
That I’ll never be able to hate you no matter what you do to me.
That you think you love(d) me more.
That I can’t forget all the mean things you said to me.
Not having my best friend.
My grandfather passed away in 2004.
My grandmother got remarried 3 years ago. Her husband always cleans up my grandfather’s grave and puts flowers on it. “Because I love him for how happy he made her for so long.”
His LGMH. I love you, GranDaddy and GranDanny.
This made my eyes water :( That’s soo sweet!
boys are the reason why waterproof mascara was invented.
It’s (not) funny cos it’s true.
I’m at an Owl City concert. I can’t even enjoy it, everything reminds me of you. This sucks!!
